But the one thing that has eluded me all these years was depicting a sense of nostalgia or memory. Adding more emotional resonance to the final image, as opposed to a calender shot. My emotional response truly conveyed.
In my dark room days I experimented with so many things... Polaroid transfers, cyanotype... various alternative process that would attempt to portray, at least for me, a more intuitive interpretation of my observations. But these approaches are not practical for me, a family guy, a father, work and life commitments. They are too time consuming for me now.
If my intent on a final image was a surreal pinhole of an abandoned building, when I was ready to shoot I found my subject and final vision would be better captured as a 35mm or perhaps a 2 1/4. My solution to this dilemma, digital.
Even as a child I have always been drawn to things that could catapult me back to a time, postcards of my Grandfather's from France, paintings of rural California from the early 1900's, a memory or feeling of timelessness.
Some years ago I worked for a large format digital printer manufacturer and was fortunate to have resources available that were shall we say, affordable to a non-professional family guy - I experimented with scans of my images appreciating the value of not having to completely prepare for a final image, not having to set up for a limited amount of time I had available for darkroom work. But I didn't always feel the quality was equal to a "true" printed image.
My love for the outdoors, nature, scenery has always been a part of me. Hiking, backpacking, mountain biking have always been a part of my life style. I got into ultralight backpacking long ago (before it was called ultra-light, we just wanted to go as far as we could with the very lightest load we were willing to carry) all have been a life long passion.
I determined years ago I am a minimalist by nature. Digital photographs have become the way for me to achieve my final vision. I create "negatives" with every shot, no longer burdened with preparation of final processing. Sure I see ahead and envision what the final result will be, but I am no longer confined to the choice if I decide to change my mind. No more return trips just to get that one elusive shot in a different medium. The choice is now at the end. The final vision is sometimes like opening a treasure chest, you never know what you may find!
My trip to Northern Arizona was very revealing in many ways. Due to life's curve balls it has been a few years since I have snapped the shutter with any real sense real intent aside from capturing a family function or personal life moment. I thought that I had lost most, if not all, right brain process. Please understand I'm not referring to true brain function merely the desire to pursue such activities. My ability to "see" simply vanished overnight. Simple things such as a colorful sunset or light reflecting off the ocean stopped capturing my attention. Once life's dust had settled and the trauma subsided I began to see things uniquely again... little by little shape, form, repetition, color all began catching my eye again but I continued onward analytically. Not entertaining creative thoughts. It was the subconscious thoughts were ready to override linearity and analytic's. See what is there and capture what you feel...
During an afternoon hike in the Coconino National Forest I came across several interesting wild aloe plants. Their form and color/tones were great and I envisioned a higher contrast B&W image but the lighting was never right. Always too harsh, too direct or bleaching out the colors. I was looking at every plant I passed but wasn't pleased.
I spotted this subject from a distance in the shade of a juniper tree but upon closer inspection there was a harsh side light reaching round the juniper that was causing a very distracting directional light low in the plant that I was "seeing" as black or dark toned. I studied this aloe from different angles, over head, left and right, hoping to get an appealing light when those wonderful summer monsoonal clouds began crossing in front of the sun diffusing the harshness. I focused on the tip of the center bud with just enough DOF to capture the close large leaf in focus that was quickly lost into the dark area in the center of the plant. I had to wait for a few clouds to pass to get just the right combo of subdued overhead and side light and snapped the shutter a few times before capturing this image. Subtle tones reaching from the edges of the image to the crisp focus of the center bud.
There is a unique feeling of history at this place. The final image should remind you of a story, a story of a journey that has been taking place for some unknown span of years. The aged memory is captured and remembered here.
After settling in I had to explore a little just to get my bearings. The sun quickly dropped behind the surrounding hills and gave way to a pleasant diffused glow. I located a campground and creek but nothing was catching my eye. When I returned I came across an interesting (in the night light that is) colored cactus and a large old aloe plant. Several very long exposures resulted. I envisioned this as I planned the shot. All mid to low gray tones contrasted by the "night bird" flying out. Almost abstract.
With a trip planned for Sedona AZ I already had a vision in mind. Not of a particular image or subject, instead perhaps, more of an insight. Usually very patient I couldn't wait to find what was waiting for me. What I may capture. Objects waiting to be found, I didn't know and didn't want to jinx it. My only real goal was to go painting with light.
"There seems to be an almost prophetic sense of satisfaction when the shutter is released for certain exposures"
Arizona Photo Set
